Va Va Voom

by Karanessa Langley June 29, 2017

We all have those dull days where we roll out of bed and clunk on the floor, maybe some more dramatic than others, wondering why we even need to brush our hair for the mundane workweek ahead. It happens. We party hard, work hard, play hard, and it’s draining! Between taking over the world with your niche and trying to stay alive through the mayhem, your mind and body can get leached of all it’s awesomeness. Sounds crucial right? Ask yourself, “Am I not being just totally awesome today? Do I need some pep in my step? Could I use a VA VA VOOM boost?” Well, do you need a VA VA VOOM injection in your life right now?

Yes, the answer is always yes! Va Va Voom is the feeling you get when you’re filled with inspiration or full of excitement and energy. That energy is transferred outside creating a lively, sexy, passionate, and alluring aura. Va Va Voom baby! It’s empowering and it shows. Whether it’s crushing an interview, impressing your employer with an assignment, killing a photoshoot, creating a masterpiece, or scoring that free cupcake at the bakery, the Va Va Voom empowerment can change your life.



Feather boa glam robe
Bad bitch walk
Hair flip
Spirit animal
Unicorns (imaginary or real both work)
More glitter beoch

It’s obvious that all the items on this list are equally as important to the process but always remember your VA VA VOOM comes from the inside, the rest is just icing on the cake to enhance yo flava.

Let’s get started now you have what you need. Instead of waking up in the morning to a drab alarm, wake up to your most empowering song. That’s your anthem now! Make sure to keep glitter in close proximity at all times. For example; in your nightstand, your medicine cabinet, in a jar on the coffee table, a handful in your purse, and some in your glove compartment. Reason being; glitter is magic and anytime you need some magic toss that shiz in the air and feel the vibrations! When I wake up to my anthem, I like to grab a handful and start my day with some sparkle. Moving on, slide on your feather boa glam robe (mine is red to represent the blood of my ex’s) and practice your hair flip as you do your bad bitch walk to the mirror.

Next step is to layer on that lipstick. It doesn’t matter what shade, as long as it makes you look into the mirror and say, ”Damn you sexy beast,” and wink. Finesse some more glitter and remember to put on your crystal and rhinestone jewelry. You can’t ever have too much, wear every piece in your jewelry box and own that look beoch. You are ready to grace the outside world with your presence!

Continue your strut throughout the day, even if you are lounging around in your castle! Keep yourself supplemented. I mean coffee and I mean a lot of it! When you need creativity, inspiration, or confidence to get the job done, call on your spirit animal and release some glitter into the air as you do your hair flip. This is guaranteed to ignite your Va Va Voom. Or anytime you feel that someone is coming at you with a negative vibe, call on your spirit animal and toss a pinch of glitter at them. A majestic creature as yourself doesn’t need that bad energy in your aura.

Continue to slather on lipstick during the day. You may start to notice people watching you with amazement and curiosity. That’s your VA VA VOOM at work. You are a fabulous and magical unicorn.

Keep implementing VA VA VOOM techniques into your life and feel free to create your own to better suit your needs so you can avoid becoming dull. Feel free to pass this on to anyone you think needs a VA VA VOOM transformation. Remember there is never a situation a little glitter magic can’t help.

Stay tuned for more unwise tales and ridiculous advice from a dirty woman. (I’m dirty because I’m also a gardener.)




Karanessa Langley
Karanessa Langley


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